I never thought I would be the recipient of a letter that informed me that my partner was cheating on me. I had heard that story before and have to say that I don’t know which way to turn, what to believe, or how to trust what he says… I feel like I am starting from square one again and although our relationship works so well in so many ways I am not sure how to think about this act of infidelity...
By Tina Tessina
Women value intimacy, safety for themselves and their children, and emotional connection. Therefore, they long for the following qualities in a man:
1. Good Judgment
Good judgment is important because it means you can count on this man to help you make good decisions. He will be balanced and think clearly about whatever needs to be done. When you know your partner has good...
By Tammy Nelson, PhD
Mirroring, validating and empathizing are a type of dialogue developed by Harville Hendrix, the author of Getting the Love You Want, a book about couple’s therapy. The dialogue is a structured technique that you can use to talk to each other that helps with communications. This dialogue has worked for thousands of couples around the world. It is a way that may help you to...
by Anastasia Strgar
My mother always told me that what people give to a relationship is never even. It is all in direct proportion to what each partner puts in their own box and that it never looks exactly as it should or comes exactly at the same time. Relationships are all about compromising and about breaking down expectations based on pre-conditioned responses.
Recently, my boyfriend and I...
The first time I learned of the idea of self soothing, I was reading a parenting book and trying to let my first child settle herself to sleep. I was more upset than she was that evening, gripping the door knob, willing myself to not open it and go in to soothe her. Awash in my own inability to self soothe, I cried as she whimpered herself to sleep. That night provided only a glimmer of the power...
“Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” – Dr Seuss
Sexual desire issues are an integral part of long-term relationships. In the twenty-six years of my own marriage I have visited all sides of the desire fence .Whether it was wanting intimacy more than my partner and not feeling wanted by my partner or not wanting my partner or intimacy at all, each machination was...
by Jennie Gill Rosier
Over the last few weeks, all but one of our four cars have stopped being able to get us from point A to point B for one reason or another. (Which, by the way, doesn’t include the Hus’ [aka- my husband’s] dream car that’s on jack stands in the garage. So technically, all but one of our fivecars don’t work. Why do we have five cars? That’s another story for another time. I...
Good Clean Love would love to thank each and every one of its Facebook followers who every day bless us with their own blessings. Though it’s been a couple of weeks, don’t think that we haven’t been noticing some of the lovely things you’ve been listing as things you’re grateful for each day. While some might think that gratitude shouldn’t be overused, these fans of ours have risen to the...
by Anastasia Strgar
About a month ago, when I was going through my own mini internal crisis, my mom showed me an article from which Katie Couric posted some of her favorite advice. It was all really good advice, but the one that got me thinking the most was a comment made by Anna Quindlen:
“Remember Pinocchio? There is a Jiminy Cricket on your shoulder, giving the very best advice. It is you,...
by Elizabeth Spannuth
I am going through the painful process of sourcing independent health insurance. I have had group insurance for the last 10 years, so initially I was just plain confused by the terms and intricacies of each plan, as well as being shocked by the monthly premium. My insurance agent patiently explained it to me about 10 times and helped clear the fog. Then I started filling out...
by Tina Tessina
The skills couples need to keep intimacy alive in a long-term relationship differ from new relationship intimacy skills, and they’re not obvious because people don’t talk about them. Most couples need to lower their expectations of romance and glamour and raise the level of fun they have together. Regular weekly talks (I call them State of the Union discussions) keep the problems...
I spent yesterday afternoon in the haunted cell block of Alcatraz with my curious teenagers. The boat ride over the sunny bay with the glistening San Francisco skyline as background belied the intensity of what was to come. Alcatraz, now a national park, is a shrine to the maximum security holding facility, infamous for being inescapable. Here was the solution for the mobsters and incorrigible...
