Love Drills

forest path

Love takes practice. Love is an action verb that is skill based; our capacity to love is the source of our genius, the inspiration for our creativity, and the essence of what roots us to the earth. Seeing our relationships in terms of a practice of love drills is a helpful approach that can keep your heart open and willing to try again, even after the inevitable hurts that define human...

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Core Vitality - Good Clean Love

Core Vitality

We take our vitality for granted. The strength of our life force impacts not only our overall physical health, but often acts as a primary filter for our emotional life and how we interpret the events that make up our days. Often we also bear witness to...

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Communication

Language is the metaphor we use to communicate our deepest feelings. A couple’s sexuality is the most profound vehicle of communication of all. The words we use and our physical language of love define our love experience.

Penetration is the word often used to describe the culminating act of sexuality. It’s a word I often use when describing the best use of good lubricant. But it was just this...

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Learning to Feel

Our feelings are like weather patterns. They are changeable and act on the environment with great power. They inform and distract with their intensity. They reflect the nature of the moment with great accuracy. Our ability to experience and share our feelings in meaningful ways is one of the profound marks of our humanity.

Yet feelings are, for many people, a locked box; an experience that...

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Making Time

forest path

Making time for love is an important barometer of the commitment and sustainability of your relationship. When you consider the outrageous scheduling hoops we agree to without qualm in our work setting, or even more intensely in managing our children’s activity calendar, it makes you wonder how the idea of scheduling intimacy could still be so taboo.

Yet, taboo it is, with an overriding belief...

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Are We Choosing “Sexting” Over Sex?

“Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing.” -Wendy Strgar

We are wired to connect to each other. Daniel Goleman’s new book, Social Intelligence, has uncovered new research on social neuroscience identifying brain cells, termed mirror neurons, which actually link us brain to brain in social interactions. The complex neural circuitry that activates in...

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Podcast 10: The Real Work

“It may be that when we no longer know what to do we have come to our real work, and that when we no longer know which way to go we have come to our real journey. The mind that is not baffled is not employed. The impeded stream is the one that sings.”

– Wendell Berry

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Q&A: How Much Sex is Enough Sex? - Good Clean Love

Q&A: How Much Sex is Enough Sex?

Question:

How many times per week does a couple have sex if they have a healthy sex life? I have been with my boyfriend for almost 6 years, and we have sex at least 3 times a week. He does not fel like that is enough… sometimes it is more than 3 times. I am not as sexually driven as he is. I am a woman, 41. I feel like what sex drive I do have, he is diminishing when he expects me to want to have...

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Podcast 09: The Next Sexual Revolution

Sarah Palin’s daughter is not the only one for whom abstinence education didn’t work. Despite the millions of dollars invested in “abstinence-only” education for youth, both teen pregnancy and birth rates have jumped up in the US after a 15 year decline. Just as our sexual attitudes and beliefs were stretched wide open by the younger generation of the 60’s, our children are demanding and creating...

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