“Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.” -Thomas Merton
One of my favorite childhood stories is the fable of the Tortoise and the Hare. Life mimics the idea that it is not always the fastest that wins the race; often it is enough to find a pace that you can maintain and have the courage and will to stay on track. Persistence and faith have staying power that speed and raw talent often lack.
I have always known myself by what I do and have been driven like the hare to prove my talents and cross some imaginary receding finish line. I would pursue in starts and stops, riding my energy as though it were an endless current. I would often comment on how I used up 3 days in one day, aware that there would be a reckoning. I know that my energy has limits and boundaries. I know that I have spent too long without refueling the source.
This quest has taught me the importance of pace and balance. Giving up the urgency to get things done and conform the world to my vision is a relief. Learning how to be with things the way they are and to remain focused on what is mine to do lends itself to a pace that I can maintain. Rest is not just a response to illness or emotional collapse, it is a part of a daily regimen.
Balance is everything. I am determined to embrace the whole of my life and accept that the varied occupations that fill my time don’t have to compete; they can coexist.