by Wendy Strgar June 20, 2014
I spent most of my youth after my parents’ divorce trying to make a family to replace the broken, violent home from which I came. I didn’t just want friends, I wanted sisters to stand beside me and help me learn what unconditional love feels like. I longed for a best friend. I met Sarah when I was 21. Within a week of knowing each other I was driving her daughter in her car to a language camp that I organized.
For us, it wasn’t a meeting but rather finding each other again.
Sarah was the one who helped me hang the parachute on the falling down ceiling in the church basement hours before my wedding. She was the one with cabbage leaves in hand for the early nursing days with my first baby. She and I and her young daughter lived together in France, memorizing the principles of miracles and learning how trusting ourselves changed the world around us. In her, I found a home in myself and every time we are together the world feels right, or more accurately, I am right with the world.
I am just home from three days with her, where we drove through the rolling hills and flat prairies of the Midwest. She accompanied me on a business trip to see a few new big customers and we filled the other hours exploring the shores of Lake Michigan, taking a mud bath, and walking the paths we had taken 25 years before. When we talk, there is a hearing that feels deeper than being heard, more like a knowing of what is behind the words.
Everything we do has a feeling of sharing- from the foods we eat, to the vistas we look on. Our intimacy has no obstacles, unlike most others we share with family. There is no ways that we are defended with each other. Even in our meditation space , we were able to share in an invisible astral space where we both felt more deeply united than we had felt before.
I always cry when it is time for us to part. It is always wrenching to leave the deep heart connect that helps me remember and feel how we are all connected. Basking in the rare moments when even my biggest weaknesses are embraced, I can forgive myself. The gift of unconditional love is a rare gem. Best friends bless you by helping you grow into your best self. If you have a best friend, express your gratitude every chance you get. If you don’t, become one and you may just find a relationship that will change your life.
by Wendy Strgar July 26, 2018
by Wendy Strgar July 12, 2018
by Wendy Strgar June 13, 2018
I remember one of the fathers of a little girl on a soccer team I was coaching years ago who came out to me and told me he was going to go through a transgender process. We were friends, so I was able to ask him about his motivations to go through the painful and expensive process. He said he wanted to finally look how he felt.