“I let go of past circumstances easily and painlessly.”

I could use a few more instructional affirmations for this one. And I don’t think that I am the only one who gets stuck in the past.  Our unresolved issues don’t just disappear with the circumstances, rather they take up residence somewhere in our body until we take the time and attention to listen to what aches in us.   I have been dedicated to this work of late, revisiting painful childhood memories that I forgot I had.

Most surprising and interesting was decades ago when my father took me to see our pediatrician Dr. Kresky. I couldn’t catch my breath. My chest was totally compressed.  It is an issue that has taken on multiple forms through out my adulthood. No one suggested then that it was a physical response to anxiety and fear that a little girl of 7 who felt things too deeply at the time could handle. It took decades for me to recognize the tightness in my chest as a symptom of panic and fear. This time, I was there to hold myself, the way I wish I could have years ago.

Even within my imagination, as I laid my hands on the back of the little girl I once was, reassured her that she would be safe and that the anger in her home was not about her, I felt my own back soften. Reintegrating our painful memories into our current reality is how to let go. All those aching parts really need is the light of our attention and the compassion we needed in the past.

For years this practice has eluded me, as I have spent decades looking outside of myself for a cure. Truly what we seek most deeply is the love we have withheld from ourselves today and in the old vestiges of our pain still residing in us.

This is a great day to let go of at least one of your old painful circumstances, and an unbelievably freeing process to commit to for the new year.