I have a cool job, or as my fifteen year old son would correct me, it is fresh. I get to imagine and then sell amazing love products. My husband bought in to the concept because he of course gets to be the primary tester- that’s the real perk of a love products business. I have learned a lot about product formulation and ingredients over the years, but what I have learned about love and marriage has been even more inspiring. So here is the big key that I wish someone had told me years ago: the more you love your partner, the more loving they become. Ever since I started this little love business, our marriage has improved steadily and our sex life is better than any other married couple I know.

Love products are an essential part of any good married life and make great nightstand reminders to love each other. Good love products that are made with natural ingredients should invite the healthy exploration of touch and scent that can often be a more easily understood form of communication. Sometimes it is good to give our words and voices a rest and let our bodies lead us to the communicating and bonding that they carry inside. In fact, after decades of marriage, I would say that it is through the physical conversations that I connect with my husband in ways that words can’t come close. This connection is where sex is making love.

Good love products make touching, kissing and smelling each other better. They should be made with natural ingredients that actually interact with your brain and don’t leave nasty and sticky residue on your skin. The products you use for love should make you feel like you are loving yourself and as far as I am concerned that leaves petro- chemicals out of the mix. Surprisingly over 90% of the OTC lubes available are made with chemicals designed first for cars or oven cleaner. Many women have severe reactions to these products and because they are all made with the same base ingredients, many women come to the false conclusion that they don’t like sex. (It’s the products.)

Scent is the most basic reflex we have when it comes to sexual attraction. Try and imagine kissing someone who smells bad to you. Love products that capitalize on true scent are actually waking up the limbic part of your brain, where memory, sexuality and emotion are conveniently stored. The gentle nudge of scents gets that arousal mechanism going and after kissing and massaging with aphrodisiac scents, your imagination (which is a really important sex organ) lets loose. Cleopatra knew this; she was known to make love on a bed of rose petals 10 inches deep.

Lubrication is at the core of good feelings in sexuality. When you are young and fit, it is usually a natural mechanism that just happens, reminding you that you feel sexy. As we age and experience more of life’s cycles (kids, nursing, illnesses and some medications) we often don’t get those messages from our body. The cool thing is, if you can apply a good and natural lube to your body and wake up those arousal feelings yourself. Anything that is oiled, wet, slick and smooth feels sexier than the same body part dry. Now that’s what I call fresh.