by Good Clean Love Staff September 13, 2011
I’ve been keeping a journal for the last few months in which I write a short reflection about my day and what I’ve learned and then list things I’m grateful for. It’s a way to keep me authentic and thinking about my daily experience. At times when I’m in a dark place I merely look through the journal and read about how far I’ve come in my personal growth quest. Last night, however, I tried something completely different- I devoted my whole 2 page entry to listing everything I could think of about me that’s so awesome.
When I first started I could only think of a few things, but after I got the ball rolling stuff came rolling out. I wrote about how kind and generous I am, how silly I am, etc, etc and when I went to bed a few minutes later I came up with three other things that I’d forgotten to put in the list. I was inspired to try this by Rob Brezny, the famed astrologer who advocates frequent Bragging sessions. Although I didn’t record mine, this time, I’d like to try that next time. Still, writing down all the ways I am so awesome lit up a light bulb for me in gratitude of myself. So many times, we’d speak so badly to ourselves that it’s no wonder this kind of Bragging practice seems silly and weird. In reality, we don’t have friends or lovers for nothing, so by writing down all the things we love about ourselves points out our ample good points to ourselves so that next time we’re having a bad time about something we can remind ourselves how awesome we are.
This method I think can also be applied to your partner and relationship. Next time you are struggling with your partner take a time out and write down a list of just ten things you love about your partner. Also encourage your partner to write a similar list about you and then sit down and share them with each other. This is a basic way of remembering all the reasons that exist in which to stay.
Start your own Bragging sessions. Whether they’re written down, recorded or merely spoken to a beloved friend and family member, these sessions can greatly heighten how you feel about yourself in a positive way. Use this particularly after you make a mistake or are feeling bad about oneself and perhaps you’ll find how many good qualities you have with which to forgive yourself.
by Wendy Strgar May 22, 2018
There is no time like long summer nights to cultivate our uniquely, profoundly human capacity for pleasure, especially sexual pleasure. Our pleasure response transforms our relationship to each other and even to life itself. Focusing on pleasure not only changes how we see our opportunities for intimate connection, but also invites us into a deeper relationship with our erotic soul.
by Wendy Strgar May 17, 2018
It becomes hard to trust your own thinking when nothing seems to be working. The space between how I thought it would go and how it is going seems to widen in front of my eyes. Maybe most difficult of all is how often the undesirable outcomes around us spill over into our relationships, both at home and at work. An errant comment too easily turns into an argument. I become blind to my impact on people around me, caught up in the unresolved problems surrounding me. During times like these, we often underestimate the power of the choices we make and how it can create a path back towards what’s working or down the slippery slope of self-destruction, which my husband affectionately calls “flirting with the gutter.”
Here is my short list to making it better when it isn’t working at all. Each one helps you do the next one, so start at the beginning and work your way down.
by Wendy Strgar May 03, 2018