Good Clean Reads

Lubrication is one of the simplest and most effective ways to make intimacy more enjoyable. And even though our bodies naturally produce lubrication, it isn’t always enough. Hormonal changes, stress, medication, or simply wanting a little more glide are all good reasons to reach for lube!

Tomorrow, I will find out if I won the Tom Holce award at the annual OEN entreprenurial celebration. I close my eyes and imagine walking up to receive my award. I have been working at savoring these moments in my mind and not being afraid to hope for the best. It is a different stance from the way I have trained myself to “not count my chickens before they hatch.”

The truth is that no matter what...

by Kristin Neff

The golden rule tells us that we should treat others as we would want them to treat us. Maybe so, but hopefully we won’t treat them even half as badly as we treat ourselves.

“You’re so lame!”

“What a screw-up!”

“How can you ever show your face in public again!”

Would you talk this way to a friend — or even to a stranger, for that matter? Of course not. (Or at least I hope not!)...

Monday mornings often create this jarring emotional space in me. I am never fully prepared for the alarm and especially on weeks that are looming with large events, I wake with uncertainty and sadness. I don’t always know where my sorrow comes from, sometimes I have a clear and ready story about some injustice perpetrated or received. But more often lately it is just another color that lives in me...

I know that forgiveness is the action verb when it comes to love and have spent years trying to learn the mysterious path that leads one to the freedom and peace that comes from forgiving. As with most things, we think we understand how something works, only to have life throw us another event to test us, to see what we really have learned.

I grew up in a family that defined dysfunction. I...

Relationship Bootcamp: Week 3

“The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t being said.” –Anonymous

The strength and endurance training in any and all relationships starts and ends with the capacity for communication. I have often called our communication skills the currency of a relationship, because it is literally the air that lives between people that makes their...

by Elizabeth Spannuth

I took advantage of Borders’ going-out-of-business sale and picked up the book, Us: Americans Talk About Love.It is a compilation of interviews with Americans from all walks of life covering the topics of relationships and love. There were no limits on the ages of the participants or how long that they had been in a relationship. The broad perspectives are a mix of...

Learning to identify and build the skills for the Crucial Conversations in your life, whether in your work or personal relationships is pivotal to success or failure in both.   Listen as author and expert, Kerry Pattersonshares his research and advice that has helped over 2 million people navigate the rough waters of high stakes discussions that both resolve problems and build relationships. The...

“This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is part of life. May I be kind to myself in this moment. May I give myself the compassion I need.”

This is a mantra that Kristin Neff, author of Self Compassion shared on my radio show recently when I asked her how can one be kind to oneself.

Self Compassionis an eloquent mix of strong social science research and her own personal stories of discovering the...

I’ve been keeping a journal for the last few months in which I write a short reflection about my day and what I’ve learned and then list things I’m grateful for. It’s a way to keep me authentic and thinking about my daily experience. At times when I’m in a dark place I merely look through the journal and read about how far I’ve come in my personal growth quest. Last night, however, I tried...