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Intimate Self-Massage: 4 Tips for Solo Touch You Can Try Today

November 11 is International Singles Day – the perfect day to indulge and appreciate being a party of one. (The date itself corresponds to the four 1s, representing singles!) Originally founded in the 1990s by Chinese students, Singles Day has spread across Asia over the years and is celebrated widely in that region of the world.

We believe that being single is nothing to be ashamed of and can absolutely be something to celebrate. In fact, over 50% of Americans (125 million) are single. So if you are riding solo, you are certainly not alone.

The Perks of Being Single

Those who are self-partnered know there are many benefits to being single, like taking the time to explore your interests, having the freedom to focus on yourself, and being able to do what you want, when you want. A study from the University of Buffalo even found that it is better for your health to be single than to be in a a bad or unsupportive relationship. However, when we are single, we can long for close touch from a special someone. The good news? You can explore ways to give affection to yourself, like solo intimate touch or massage.

Solo massage is a great way to indulge in some self-care and get the benefits of contact. Touch has immense benefits to humans, research shows that physical touch makes us more confident, cooperative, calm, compassionate, and boosts our immune system.

Even brief touch produces immediate changes in how people react and process information. Touch wakes up the prefrontal areas of our brain which control our ability to relax and emote. Receiving and giving touch produces oxytocin, a hormone that helps create a sensation of trust and reduces levels of the stress hormone cortisol. Although not the same as partnered touch, self-massage is a great way to get the benefits of touch that we desire. 

4 Tips to Get the Best Out of Self-Massage

Focus on Your Erogenous Zones

We all have erogenous zones or sensitive parts of the body that excite feelings of pleasure when stimulated. Focusing on these parts of the body can make self-massage more enriching and enjoyable. Here are some of the best erogenous zones to focus on and a suggestion for how to stimulate them in self-massage.

  • Your Scalp: Many of us know from personal experience that the scalp can be one of the most relaxing and pleasurable places to be touched or massaged. Getting a scalp massager or using your fingernails to stimulate the scalp is a great way to stimulate this erogenous zone.
  • Your Inner Arm and Armpit: A light touch is all you need to stimulate this erogenous zone. Use your fingertips or even a feather to trace the skin in this area lightly. This part of the body can be especially ticklish at first, but it may turn into pleasure if you continue with the light touch.
  • Your Neck: Even the slightest touch to the neck can excite feelings of pleasure. This erogenous zone is best stimulated with the fingernails or fingers with a light touch. Another great way to massage the neck is to rub the lower half of the neck and shoulders.
  • Your Navel and Stomach: This is an especially sensitive area of the body due to its proximity to the genitals. Use your fingertips or a feather to lightly caress this area to stimulate this erogenous zone.

There are many more erogenous zones on the body, learn more about them here.

Incorporate Your Other Senses

Touch is beneficial enough, but adding in other sensory experiences can make self-massage even better. A great way to do this is to incorporate aromatherapy or aphrodisiac scents into your self-massage. Using a body oil or massage candle can enhance your experience by making it easier to massage yourself while incorporating the power of scent; Good Clean Love’s aphrodisiac massage candles and oils are a great option for this.

Set the Mood

Creating an atmosphere for your solo touch session is a great way to enjoy time to yourself. Try lighting some candles, doing a self-massage in the bath, or putting on some relaxing music. Make it fun!

Add to Your Self-Care Ritual

Incorporating self-massage into a self-care routine can make you enjoy being solo even more. Cook dinner for yourself, draw a bubble bath, or watch your favorite movie before or after enjoying a solo touch session. Adding these activities into a routine with self-massage can make the experience even more enjoyable.


Practicing self-massage is a great way to celebrate Singles Day and give yourself the touch and attention you may be longing for.