I rarely speak directly about sex. I feel like I am still inventing a language that I can use comfortably in the world, one that envelops the physical, but also transcends it. It is important to talk about orgasm, and to understand the power of it in daily life. But so much of this language has been usurped by an industry that sells us cheap images of organs, or people who feel like they just met and who never questioned for a minute how to find orgasm.
It is a journey and a willingness and an opening wide and a trusting of the unknown. It is the height of physical transcendence when shared in love. It changes my life every time it happens and I can’t think of any experience that I look forward to more- This desire makes me desirable to my husband, it is the anchor that keeps us glued through the ridiculous soccer schedules, and cars breaking down and garbage that needs to go out and homework that needs help.
I have heard other educators talk about the sexual need in men in terms of a basis of survival. Men are not whole, nor wholly alive without their sexual needs being met. For women, it is said, it is not so primal. That is not true for me I think, at least not now and I am grateful for wanting to meet a need that is more basic to how I feel than anything I can compare. So I am going to explore a discussion of sexual arousal and I ask your forgiveness for places where language fails me. I don’t want to be graphic, but clearly understood, the process is visceral and must be allowed to live in the body, if the joy of transcending it is ever possible.
Stay tuned and speak freely about the o-word here, it is safe.