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Love Needs Nurturing: Q&A with Psychotherapist Rachel Wright

Psychotherapist Rachel Wright (she/her) is recognized as one of the freshest voices on modern relationships and sex. She is an experienced speaker, group facilitator, educator, therapist, coach, and on-camera mental health and relationship expert. With a master’s degree in clinical psychology, Rachel has worked with thousands of humans all over the world, helping them scream less and screw more. 

How do you create moments of love in your life? In your work, in your intimate relationships, in your family life, with nature, etc?

To me, relationships are relationships are relationships are relationships are relationships. Regardless of the type of love I share with someone (familial, romantic, platonic), love is also love. I create moments of love by looking at the love I share with each human I have the pleasure of doing so with, as a living breathing being. Our love needs nurturing and tending and is constantly evolving as we grow as people. I carve out time on my calendar for my relationships and look inward to figure out what truly feels like LOVE and commit to taking that space and time to feel it.

How do you show yourself love?

This is such a tough and wonderful question. One of the most complex relationships that we have in this lifetime is the one we have with ourselves. We can’t break off the relationship, we can’t get space, we are with ourselves in sickness and in health, for richer and poorer... we’ve got ourselves. I show myself love by taking intentional time to ask myself what I need and how I want to feel and then take time to do the things or be with the people that cultivate that feeling or need. It’s a simple and powerful practice that really helps me stabilize my mental health. 

When was the feeling of love so strong that you had to tell someone about it?

The first time I had a feeling of 'love' that was so strong that I had to tell someone about it was when I was 14 years old. I remember feeling trust and safety and comfort with my boyfriend that I had only experienced with family members at that point. I remember asking my friends if that's what being in love felt like... wanting to make out all the time and feeling safe. I guess I wasn't far off!

How do you show up for love?

I show up for love in my actions every single day. I try my best to bring empathy, kindness, and openness to all of my relationships and pour into those I love dearly.

When did the word ‘love’ become real to you?

The word love has always been real to me... I can't think of a time when I didn't LOVE someone or something, and actively act on that love.