Question:

My husband and I have been married 21 years and I have a low sex drive. However, he says that 2 or 3 times a month he wakes up to me masturbating. He says that sometimes I have very strong orgasms and I know this to be true as sometimes I wake up during the night or in the morning and my panties/sheets and/or hands have very obvious signs. Is it normal to do this in my sleep?

Answer:

You might be experiencing “sexomnia,”  which is considered a sleep disorder, but nothing to worry about. Or, you may just be having some really good dreams! Many men and women orgasm in their sleep, so in that respect it’s “normal”. However, I wonder if there is a different problem for you. You mention your “low sex drive”. Are you concerned or confused about the difference in your sexual desire between being awake and asleep? Do have these wonderful orgasms while awake? If not, would you like to? If so, what might be getting in the way of your desire while you’re awake? Some common libido killers include relationship problems, body-image issues, physical and/or psychological issues, etc. This is a good opportunity to discuss with your husband to explore ways to have these wonderful orgasms when awake, and to enhance your sex-life together.