The first time I learned of the idea of self soothing, I was reading a parenting book and trying to let my first child settle herself to sleep. I was more upset than she was that evening, gripping the door knob, willing myself to not open it and go in to soothe her. Awash in my own inability to self soothe, I cried as she whimpered herself to sleep. That night provided only a glimmer of the power...
“Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” – Dr Seuss
Sexual desire issues are an integral part of long-term relationships. In the twenty-six years of my own marriage I have visited all sides of the desire fence .Whether it was wanting intimacy more than my partner and not feeling wanted by my partner or not wanting my partner or intimacy at all, each machination was...
By Teagan Shepard
Do you find that, even though you spend a good bit of time with your partner, you just don’t feel that connected anymore? It’s highly likely that quantity doesn’t equal quality for you.
Every so often, and I recommend once a week, do something that both of you enjoy and can connect with. Not sure what to do anymore? Here are a few tips.
Take a hike. Seriously, get out of the...
by Jennie Gill Rosier
Over the last few weeks, all but one of our four cars have stopped being able to get us from point A to point B for one reason or another. (Which, by the way, doesn’t include the Hus’ [aka- my husband’s] dream car that’s on jack stands in the garage. So technically, all but one of our fivecars don’t work. Why do we have five cars? That’s another story for another time. I...
“For having lived long, I have experiences many instances of being obliged, by better information or fuller consideration, to change opinions, even on important subjects, which I once thought right but found to be otherwise.” -Benjamin Franklin
One lesson that I didn’t expect to learn from focusing on receiving is how little opinions actually matter. This is surprising, as I have long relied on...
by Anastasia Strgar
About a month ago, when I was going through my own mini internal crisis, my mom showed me an article from which Katie Couric posted some of her favorite advice. It was all really good advice, but the one that got me thinking the most was a comment made by Anna Quindlen:
“Remember Pinocchio? There is a Jiminy Cricket on your shoulder, giving the very best advice. It is you,...
“For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is always work, patience, love, self-sacrifice – no paper currency, no promises to pay, but the gold of real service.” ~John Burroughs
It is perhaps the deepest aspect of our human nature to seek security and assurance. This innate need is the foundation of our survival mechanism and fuels the multibillion dollar insurance...
by Tina Tessina
The skills couples need to keep intimacy alive in a long-term relationship differ from new relationship intimacy skills, and they’re not obvious because people don’t talk about them. Most couples need to lower their expectations of romance and glamour and raise the level of fun they have together. Regular weekly talks (I call them State of the Union discussions) keep the problems...
I spent yesterday afternoon in the haunted cell block of Alcatraz with my curious teenagers. The boat ride over the sunny bay with the glistening San Francisco skyline as background belied the intensity of what was to come. Alcatraz, now a national park, is a shrine to the maximum security holding facility, infamous for being inescapable. Here was the solution for the mobsters and incorrigible...
by Anastasia Strgar
My boyfriend, an avid golfer, is playing in a golf tournament this weekend and thus came to me in our new home the other day letting me know that if he’s practicing a lot it’s A) because he loves to golf and B) because he really wants to play well this weekend. However, he also had kept in mind that A) we’re in the process of moving in and B) didn’t want me to feel like my...
“Marriage problems are relationship problems; they are the result of how two people interact with each other. You may abandon a troubled marriage, but you will still bring the way you interact with others along with you.” -Mark Gungor
It has been years since I have been close to a divorce; however, I have witnessed many others from a distance over the years, mostly through the vacant expressions...
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door shall be opened.” -The Bible
This is the verse that often pops into my head unbidden of late. The more I practice focusing my thinking through gratitude, the more I know that what I am seeking is right there in...
