What Kind of Lube Should I Use?
Lubrication is one of the simplest and most effective ways to make intimacy more enjoyable. And even though our bodies naturally produce lubrication, it isn’t always enough. Hormonal changes, stress, medication, or simply wanting a little more glide are all good reasons to reach for lube!
Mating in Captivity
The Atlantic Monthly review, about yet another series of clinical vignettes about the struggles of combining marital responsibilities and sexual passion, is worth reading. I haven’t read the book, and from this reviewer’s description, not sure that I need to- but what interested me in the article was the idea of giving up all this talking that is going on about what is wrong with our sex lives…
When it All Goes Wrong
Some days nothing works. Worse still it seems like everything I touch loses possibility. Options close. What to do… Crying is a legitimate response. More legitimate than turning the events into a story line of failure and despair. Staying out of this place is the work of sustainability. It happens, there are these runs of breakdown, everything from bursting cooking elements in old stoves to...
To Stay or Leave with Love
I believe in love. I believe that love can prevail even in the worst of situations. I believe that the force of love can create a forgiveness and trust that can heal the deepest of conflicts. I believe that love is the light for which we all wait, hands outstretched, wanting to feel part of, wanting to create. This is the motivation we have when we begin relationships. Few of us believe these...
How Relationships Die
I learned this powerfully sad lesson again today. It has happened before, but it’s been a while. A relationship that has no air in it, where one or both people refuse to communicate, is dying. The currency between the people is cut, and there is nothing to build, nowhere even to begin a reconstruction. The relationship is stuck- beliefs are entrenched, feelings numb or too hurt to approach, the...
Thinking Solar
The sun is the only passive source of energy in the universe. All the light and all the heat that exists without our effort begins there. The idea of transforming that light into usable energy is at the center of the circle in sustainable thinking. The fire and heat that exist in a love relationship is also a renewable form of energy. Thinking of our sexuality as a form of solar energy for our...
Global Orgasm
Today I learned of a global orgasm event (www.globalorgasm.org) set to take place on the winter solstice, December 22nd- The event was conceived to “effect change in the energy field of the Earth through input of the largest possible surge of human energy.” Any of us who share in the pleasure of regular orgasm can attest to the fact that there is little else we can do in life to create the...
Understanding Erotophobia: Meaning and Definition Explained
Water Shatters Glass
Tonight I learned a physics lesson, live, in my own oven. I added a bit of warm water to a pyrex glass pan, and shattered it to pieces. I still don’t fully understand the power that warm water has to shatter glass, no more than I understand the rate at which relationships all around us are failing. Maybe I am drawing a metaphor that doesn’t hold up, but...
