What Kind of Lube Should I Use?
Lubrication is one of the simplest and most effective ways to make intimacy more enjoyable. And even though our bodies naturally produce lubrication, it isn’t always enough. Hormonal changes, stress, medication, or simply wanting a little more glide are all good reasons to reach for lube!
Water Shatters Glass
Tonight I learned a physics lesson, live, in my own oven. I added a bit of warm water to a pyrex glass pan, and shattered it to pieces. I still don’t fully understand the power that warm water has to shatter glass, no more than I understand the rate at which relationships all around us are failing. Maybe I am drawing a metaphor that doesn’t hold up, but...
Effective Communication for Emotional Intimacy & Healthy Relationships
The Heart and Soul of Sex
Here is the book that so many women that I meet and that long for a sex life that works for them must read. Gina Ogden, conducted a survey with close to 4000 women on aspects of sexuality, spirituality and their meeting place. In addition to insightful and fascinating quotes from many of these women, the book explores in depth the emotional, mental and spiritual connections that mean the most in...
The Devil’s in the Details
It always seems to catch me off guard, the re-entry into family life. I am just back from a five days trip to the Bioneers conference. I worked hard there, talking to many people about my beliefs about love and the importance of sustaining and valuing our intimate relationships as the core of our activism. There was one conversation I had in particular that struck me, a guy from another booth...
Ecology of Love
Just back from the 17th annual Bioneers conference. What an incredible exciting group of individuals with so many do-able and sustainable ideas for a world that works for everyone. It is very inspiring to be in the presence of so much hope and intention. I myself, talked and talked and talked about making love sustainable. Here’s the short version…
The Smell of Love
Well, after thinking about my previous post of “just do it,” I decided at the risk of sounding like an infomercial, that I wanted to share some facts about how important your sense of smell is in the act of love. It is odd that we so often overlook scent when we think about finding a mood for love because the limbic part of our brain that registers scent is also the part of the brain that controls...
Just Do It
The question that comes up most often when I suggest that we give up this idea that we should be in the mood to engage in or respond to an invitation for intimacy is, How do you do it? So I know it is not much of a response to say, well just do it… but here’s the thing, a lot of people actually really enjoy the closeness and the sensations of intimacy once they get started. Leaping over the mental...
Sexuality and Censorship
Censorship is defined in the dictionary as an official with the power to examine movies, books, television programming and to remove or prohibit anything considered obscene, politically objectionable, etc. There is some general agreement about what constitutes sexual obscenity and objectionable sexual content. I have in the course of my work been faced with situations and people who have very...
All Kinds of Sex
People have different expectations and experiences and desires about sex. OK, stating the obvious here, but actually what I mean to say is that people in the same bed, in the same sexual experience often have totally different expectations, experiences and desires… Individual preferences are impacted by everything from our personal history to our comfort with our own body- but because language is...