The older I get, the more I appreciate how long it truly takes to be able to understand, articulate and define what we know. Partly this is because what we know is continuously evolving as we grow. The deep wisdom of aging doesn’t come from what we know nearly as much as it does from witnessing all that we haven’t been able to see and that we may well never know. Successful aging, I think, is when our perspective becomes so wide that we embrace the unknown as the open space that contains what we come to know and hold most dear. As I become more comfortable with the expanding immensity of all that is uncertain, even unknowable, the gift is that what we know for sure becomes crystal clear. So after over a decade of searching, growing, learning, it is an honor to share with you the new Good Clean Love brand voice of what I know for sure- we’re calling it “Make It Good.”
Love is good.
The single most important thing that I know for sure is that the only thing we came here for is to learn how to love, both in quantity and quality. Each and every time we are faced with the truth of our mortality and the brevity of this one life, it becomes clearer that all our other activities, achievements, acquisitions are distractions from our longing for love; it is the single most profound reward of our existence. It is in love that we become our kindest, best selves. And it is within the confines of our most intimate relationships that we suffer the greatest pain, and if we are lucky, it is love again that picks us up, brushes us off and sends us on our way to try again. And yet, I am often troubled by the emerging generation of adults and the new digital age that now defines our modern culture which is not leading us closer to the heart of what we need and long for most. The newly defined parameters of sexual freedom overwhelms with choice but comes up way short in taking responsibility for our relational needs. Having sex with people who care nothing for us is not really sexual freedom, it is another form of bondage. The “Make It Good” wellness and sexual health campaign is about reinventing intimate relationships, not abandoning them; creating sacred space that can both hold the sexual and care for both partners.
Mutual Consent is Good.
Sex can only be good if both people want to be there. True sexual delight emerges from a continuous choosing in the moment, saying yes to the raw vulnerability of the erotic self and most importantly wanting the person you are with. Consent does not happen in a single moment, rather it is the literal embodiment of how we say yes- the fiery essence of what makes sex intriguing, unpredictable and good.
Consent is how more and more people are courageously finding their voice to declare the absence of this choosing. It is a bold statement of knowing what we don’t want. And yet, knowing what we want for ourselves sexually is the other half of this essential equation. The more we can speak about and own our own sexual preferences and desires, the more comfortable we will become speaking up earlier and sooner about sexual situations that hold no appeal. Choosing when, where and with whom we want to share our sexual selves is how we build our sexual self-confidence and “Make It Good”.
Equal pleasure is good.
Expecting to be pleasured is a fundamental right of any sexual exchange and in my view the only way that you can “Make It Good”. And yet, sexual pleasure is often not equally experienced. The old refrain “It was good for him…” is not only seriously dated, but also eliminates the possibility of truly memorable and lasting good sex. This wellness & sexual health campaign exposes the abyss between being sexual and being sexualized that our culture desperately needs to bridge. Arming girls with the knowledge and confidence to build their own experience of orgasmic pleasure with no shame attached is a far cry from the ways that girls come to understand their sexuality is in its objectification- looking and dressing sexy, being witnessed as sexy, and being good at pleasuring their partner. “Make It Good” is a process of mutual pleasure discovery.
Healthy ingredients are good.
There are so many good pleasure reasons to have healthy lubrication available, but chief among them is the way that well lubricated sex prevents painful sex. For way too many years lubricant ingredients defeated their original intent. Instead of supplementing with long lasting glide, heavily concentrated petrochemical lubes created a sticky, messy, sometimes burning and itching excuse to run to the shower. We know better now and there are a growing number of healthy alternatives to turn us all back onto and we can “Make It Good” with lubricant. Learn more about Good Clean Love’s line of organic lubricants online today.