Well, it made it to the front page of most newspapers again today, the governor of New York was caught in a sting of an elite, top-priced prostitute ring. On the day before Valentine’s Day, no less. His career in a shambles, Mr. Clean, as he was referred to for his corruption-fighting administration, has fallen among the rest of us mortals. It probably won’t be the end of his career. After all, it was only 8 short years ago that Hillary was the wronged wife, and now look at her—putting on the pants in the family to bring the commander-in-chief role home again. Only a few political pundits are recalling the shame of it all with cartoons of Bill kissing another woman in front of her—Hillary’s comment, It’s ok if she is a super delegate.
It’s weird the shock and dismay we express when our leaders act like us. Even if you just count the numbers in pornography viewers, dollars spent, and time consumed, we are a sexually frustrated nation, to say the least. Match these numbers against the number of sexually satisfied partners, and the picture gets really dismal. I mean, the governor has a nice-looking wife of many years, three teenage daughters. How come he wasn’t with her planning a Valentine’s Day tryst? What is the story about Bill and Hillary anyway? Did they just forget about it? Do they share a bed or a room? Why do we keep acting like nothing happened?
In fact, something is happening in our sex lives today. They are being co-opted by mainstream media, which blurs with pornography in advertising, music, and television all the time. Despite being surrounded by all that sex, the number one question that I get all the time is about how to keep the passion going in a long-term relationship. We are disappointed that the sexuality we share in our daily relationships doesn’t sizzle like the kind we see everywhere. We use our sex lives as the barometer of whether the relationship is working or not and bail without considering why.
Our intimate wellness is being overshadowed by unrealistic portrayals of sex today. True intimacy requires more than just physical attraction; it involves emotional connection, mutual respect, and understanding. Here are some tips to enhance your intimate relationship in a healthy and sustainable way:
- Communicate openly with your partner about your needs and desires.
- Explore new activities together to keep the relationship exciting.
- Invest time in understanding each other's love languages.
- Use natural and organic intimate care products to ensure safety and comfort.
- Focus on building emotional intimacy, not just physical attraction.
Understanding the dynamics of sex today also involves recognizing the impact of societal expectations and media influence. The portrayal of intimacy in media often sets unrealistic standards, leading to dissatisfaction in personal relationships. By refocusing on genuine connection and using products that support a healthier lifestyle, we can redefine what intimacy means in our lives.
I was just sent a book to review and the publisher after seeing my Good Clean Love work thought I would want to see another title they just published called Porn Star Secrets of Sex. In the introduction she compares porn stars to the likes of Susan B. Anthony and Margaret Mead. If we were more like porn stars, she says, we wouldn’t feel ashamed of our bodies and we would embrace our sexual selves. Emulating porn stars would save us from routine missionary position- lights out sex, claims the author.
I personally am totally uninterested in sex for the sake of sex. I am looking for the big bang for my buck, actually making love to someone who loves me, tolerates my bad moods and bad behavior, stands behind me when I am falling. Even the most garden variety of that sex would win out over any rolicking ride ’em cowgirl sex with someone I will never see again.
Here is the critical link we are missing about sex today- it was actually made for love.
