Good Clean Reads

Looking for a Christmas gift that will give you hours of enjoyment? I can heartily recommend this big picture book by Susan Crain Bakos, The Sex Bible. (Yes, you can get them on Good Clean Love). Besides the tasteful full page photographs, the messaging throughout the book supports my belief that sex and love are meant to be the best of friends and that both are greatly enhanced by each other.

Th...

Language is the metaphor we use to communicate our deepest feelings. A couple’s sexuality is the most profound vehicle of communication of all. The words we use and our physical language of love define our love experience.

Penetration is the word often used to describe the culminating act of sexuality. It’s a word I often use when describing the best use of good lubricant. But it was just this...

I recently read a beautifully written article about one woman’s account of the journey through breast cancer treatment. During this time, she was teaching writing to inmates in jail. She compared her experience so articulately when she said that they both wanted the same thing- “We both wanted out, or rather, a way back in to our ordinary lives. ” This is the tragedy of life I think, that we...

When I teach about the Ecology of Love and talk about the water that lives between people I often use the term “showing up” to describe the flow that happens in relationships. In relationships, like the ocean, there is an ebb and tide to how we are present for each other, but if the water in the relationship is always out, then both people feel alone more often than they feel like there is...

The chances that you know someone who is divorced, about to divorce or the immediate cause of a divorce are greater than you might think- well actually we all know the statistics- less than 50% of married couples stay married- and affairs are often the precursor to the end. But just this week, a couple we have known well and socialized with intimately joined the statistics- the husband had been...

A finer description of the state of humanity would be hard to come by or feel more true for my life situation of late. The question of biology and hormonal influences have to come up because it is hard to justify the feelings of exhaustion and despair that can just wash over me. The Buddhists call this shengpa, this ineffable experience of feelings that turn into solid reality in our thoughts and...

The New England Journal of Medicine recently reported the results of the largest national survey of Americans between the ages of 57 to 85. The goal of the study was to provide some baseline data on sexuality in later life. Our idea of fading sexuality over the years is misplaced- Of the 3000 people surveyed, three quarters of them were married or living with a partner and three fourths of them...

A friendly reminder from your favorite loveologist: We promote healthy sex- because it is good for you.

Physical intimacy doesn’t just feel good….Making love is good for you as shown by hundreds of major medical studies. These studies are suggesting that an active sexual life may lead to a longer life, better heart health, a healthier immune response, reduction in chronic pain symptoms, lower...