September 24, 2006
I rarely speak directly about sex. I feel like I am still inventing a language that I can use comfortably in the world, one that envelops the physical, but also transcends it. It is important to talk about orgasm, and to understand the power of it in daily life. But so much of this language has been usurped by an industry that sells us cheap images of organs, or people who feel like they just met...
September 21, 2006
I read yet another memoir in this month’s issue of Moremagazine about the dissolution of yet another marriage. This is a story that is familiar, so many women, more than not, can relate to it, and even some of the women who are still married can kind of relate, because there are plenty of married couples who have one foot out the door. This essay was thoughtful, insightful and well written...
September 20, 2006
Interesting article in the New York Times today about the People who share a bed and the things they say about it… The author Paul Rosenblatt interviewed 42 couples, most heterosexual married, but the study also included a small sample of homosexual non-married couples. According to the National Sleep Foundation, 61% of Americans share their bed and surprisingly, of the individual’s polled...
September 19, 2006
Great summary of a complex yet deeply important angle on healthy sexuality. Our human urge to sexuality and the myriad ways we play it out, or don’t, carry an intrinsic burden of guilt and shame. I mean let’s face it, as much as I enjoy my late night dates with my husband, I couldn’t...
September 18, 2006
"i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite a new thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body. i like what it does,
i like its hows. i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones, and the trembling
-firm- smooth ness and which i wil
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the , shocking fuzz
of your electric fur, and what-is-it comesover parting flesh…And eyes big love crumbs,
and possibly i like the thrill
of under me you so quite new"
September 14, 2006
I really enjoy reading books for men by men about relationships. It totally confirms for me what I learned when I read my first book about boys while trying to raise my eldest son. The Wonder of Boyswas a total revelation for me, and it taught me more about what had been trying and difficult in my marriage than years of therapy. I remember reading the part about how boys express themselves...
September 13, 2006
What about all these DINS out there- have you heard of that group yet? Worse still, are you a member? Apparently it’s growing more rapidly than DINKs – you know them, the couple that looks like they have it all, but actually aren’t getting any- The Dual Income No Sex group. It’s weird, how many couples are willing to give up the best reason to be in a couple without really fighting for it. Or...
September 13, 2006
I often tell clients and customers to give up the idea of being in the mood. I feel fortunate to still have an ovulation cycle, changeable as it might be, to remind me of what the surge of hormones can do for my often hard to find libido. And yet, for as infrequently as those hormones seem to help, I am often looking for other routes to awaken a hunger for desire.
Scent is a remarkable and yet...
November 16, 2005
Sustainability is the catch phrase of this generation, it means learning how to use current resources in a way that does not harm the future. We hear about this in terms of building homes, cultivating food, and rethinking our natural and energy resources Basically, we are finally being compelled to listen to the voice of indigenous wisdom to our lives in such a way that we can meet the needs of...